I’m not totally sure where The Staircase Ritual originated; it is credited on most creepypasta repositories to somebody going by the title “CousinSpookyNoodles,” but the website where it was found is never given. In any case, though, this one is long and involved, so it’s best to not undertake it unless you can dedicate at least two days to it — such as an uninterrupted 13-hour stretch to the second half. It is not quite an exorcism, but if you’ve got something weird going on in your home, it is going to help include it by banishing it to the first floor. Additionally, it places a string of barriers either slowing down or stopping whatever may be preventing you from making its way from the first floor to the second. You’re going to have to face it eventually, however, so be prepared for a fight.
As always, play at your own risk.
1 stairs with no fewer than 11 steps, but no longer than 16 (excluding landings). A staircase with 12 or 13 steps is ideal.
1 small, mobile, battery-operated fan.
1 glass of water.
1 handful of dirt.
1 candle.
Matches or a lighter.
As old a picture of the land on which your house currently stands as you can find.
1 image of your home as it’s today.
1 pair of six-sided dice. 2 timekeeping devices. Analog is preferable, but digital will work in a pinch.
1 food offering. It has to be a creature or animal byproduct.
1 mirror.
1 handful of ash.
2 to 3 dust bunnies.
1 small living creature. An insect is ideal.
1 fingernail, lock of hair, or other token plucked from your own body. It’s not advised that blood be used.
Salt.
1 sharp object, preferably made from silver.
1 principal
Casting Directions for ‘Staircase Ritual’
The Prelude:
1. Begin in the afternoon. Make note of the precise time at which you commence.
2. Stand at the bottom of the staircase. Speak aloud the words, “It is from here whenceforth I will commence.”
3. On the first step, set the small fan. Recite, “Here is the atmosphere that mortal breathes.”
4. On the second step, place the glass of water. Recite, “This is the water that deadly drinks.”
5. On the third step, spread the handful of dirt, covering as much of the step as possible. Recite, “This is the ground on which mortal stands.”
6. On the fourth measure, place the unlit candle, laying the lighter or matches next to it. Recite, “This is the fire which burns mortal’s hands.”
7. On the fifth measure, set the old image of your dwelling. Recite, “This is the time which has come to pass.”
8. On the sixth step, place the present picture of your house and roll the dice with it. Recite, “Here is the present and the die is cast.”
9. On the seventh step, place one of your timekeeping devices. Recite, “Here comes the long run, the time ticks by now.”
10. On the eighth step, place your food offering. Recite, “Here is the offering for Devil’s mouth.”
11. On the ninth step, place the mirror. Recite. “Here is my image, in God’s likeness I trust.” NOTE: This phrase has to be repeated word for word and without hesitation, regardless regarding the faith of the principal.
12. On the tenth step, place the handful of ash and the dust bunnies. Recite, “This is mortality, dust and ashes.”
13. On the eleventh step, place your living creature. It has to be alive, and it must not be able to escape. Recite, “Here is a life I present unto thee.”
14. On the twelfth step, place the token from your body. Recite, “And here is the essence extracted from me.”
15. On the last step or landing, draw a line of salt. Recite, “No further than here.”
16. Leave your objects in place on the stairs overnight.
Do NOT proceed if anything appears amiss the next day (see: Added Notes). If all is well, however, proceed as follows:
The Main Event:
1. Evacuate all occupants of the house except the principal. Gather up your sharp thing and your second timekeeping device. Keep these items with you at all times.
2. Begin at the precise time you commenced the Prelude. Stand the bottom of the staircase. Plant your feet. Do not move.
3. After an hour has passed, mount the first step and turn on the fan. Face the top of the staircase. Plant your feet. Do not move. Do not turn around or look behind you.
4. After the second hour has passed, mount the second step. Drink the entire glass of water. Face the top of the staircase. Plant your feet. Do not move. Don’t turn around or look behind you.
5. After the third hour has passed, mount the next step, making sure both of your feet are on or in the dirt spread across it. Face the top of the staircase. Plant your feet. Do not move. Do not turn around or look behind you.
6. After the fourth hour has passed, mount the fourth step. Take up the lighter or matches and light the candle. Make sure it doesn’t go out. Face the top of the staircase. Plant your feet. Do not move. Do not turn around or look behind you.
7. Following the fifth hour has passed, mount the fifth step. Use the candle in the fourth measure to burn the old image of your dwelling. Once the image is unrecognizable or burnt completely to ash, then blow out the candle. Face the top of the staircase. Plant your feet. Do not move. Don’t turn around or look behind you. A.NOTE: It may be helpful to hold the candle during step 6 and carry it with you to step 7. At NO POINT should you turn around or look behind you.
8. After the sixth hour has passed, mount the sixth step. Take up the current picture of your home and rip it as many times as indicated by the roll of the dice, but do not allow it to fall to pieces. Face the top of the staircase. Plant your feet. Do not move. Do not turn around or look behind you.
9. Following the hour has passed, mount the seventh step. Turn the clock ahead as many hours as indicated by the roll of the dice on the previous step. Do NOT turn the clock backwards. Face the top of the staircase. Plant your feet. Do not move. Do not turn around or look behind you.
10. After the eighth hour has passed, mount the eighth step. Take a bite of the food offering and swallow it. Do NOT allow your face to betray any dislike or disgust. Show as much pleasure as possible. Face the top of the staircase. Plant your feet. Do not move. Do not turn around or look behind you.
11. After the ninth hour ends, mount the ninth step. Pick up the mirror and look into it, focusing on your own face. Do NOT look at anything aside from your face, regardless of what might attempt to catch your attention. Face the top of the staircase. Plant your feet. Do not move. Do not turn around or look behind you.
12. Following the hour has passed, smash the mirror and mount the tenth step. Use your sharp object to bring forth a new drop of your blood. Allow the fall to fall on the heap of ash and dust. Face the top of the staircase. Plant your feet. Do not move. Don’t turn around or look behind you.
13. Following the eleventh hour has passed, mount the eleventh step. Kill the insect. Face the top of the staircase. Plant your feet. Do not move. Do not turn around or look behind you.
14. After the hour has passed, mount the twelfth step. Take up the token plucked from your own body and swallow it whole. Face the top of the staircase. Plant your feet. Do not move. Do not turn around or look behind you.
15. Following the thirteenth hour has passed, mount the final step. Keep your sharp object close.
The Ending:
1. Turn around.
Good luck.
Additional Notes:
The instructions detailed here are designed for a home where the occupants sleep on the second floor. If, however, you sleep on the first floor, simply reverse the directions — that is, start the ritual on the top step and work your way to the bottom, rather than starting at the bottom and working your way towards the top.
If you do not have a staircase, you may still do the ritual using a very long hallway. In the event of a hallway, mark the division between every “step” at regular intervals with a line of salt. Not NOT perform this ritual in a room. Do NOT perform it out. Do NOT perform it in any small, enclosed spaces.
The Main Event doesn’t necessarily have to be carried out on the day immediately after the Prelude, but it’s advised that it be performed as soon as possible. The more trips you or any other occupants of your house take up or down the stairs, the poorer the twelve hurdles set up will become; moreover, depending on the strength of your unwelcome guest, they might not hold for more than a few nights to begin with.
If, after the Prelude, you return to the staircase to find some of those objects disturbed, do NOT proceed. Likewise if you wake during the night or have nightmares while you sleep, do NOT proceed. If anything out of the ordinary occurs between the time when you complete the Prelude and Start the Main Event, DO NOT PROCEED. Perform the following:
To Abort the Ritual:
Put a ring of salt around each item on the stairs, around your bed, and around the bed of any other occupants in your dwelling. Leave them overnight. Remove from your home.
Destroy them by any means necessary.
